Stunned by her own fiendish accomplishment, Leia slowly lurched toward all that remained of the Caped Crusader. Was this for real? Did it actually happen? Had Catwoman finally finished off the Batman?

Moments earlier, the so-called Countess of Criminality had her arch nemesis secured in a devilish contraption.
“This apurratus will bring a cataclysmic ending to your amewsing existence,” she bragged as she seductively hovered her paw over a red, oversized kitten-shaped button.

“One push, and this de-catomizer will invert every meowlecule in your body, litterally vapurrizing you.

It was the type of trap our hero had seen before, multiple times. Absurdly constructed, this Rube Goldbergian mechanism surely had an exploitable flaw, much like similar contrivances erected by the likes of The Joker, The Penguin and Mr. Freeze. No doubt, something in Batman’s utility belt would render Catwoman’s device inopurrable, as she would say.

But before anyone could say “same bat time,” our special guest villainess slammed down her paw, activating the chemical reaction, effectively dispersing The Dark Knight into the Gotham atmosphere.

And that was that. Batman would pow, bam and biff no more.

But in her unprecedented moment of triumph, the Princess of Plunder didn’t feel like celebrating. She had secretly enjoyed their extralegal tête-à-tête, this cat-and-mouse game they routinely employed. She’d commit a crime, he’d capture her, she’d capture him, he’d escape and capture her again. This was their thing. She loved it! And though he never actually said it, she knew he loved it too.

Her henchcats, Calico and Tortoiseshell, cleaned up the scene, the latter tossing Batman’s cowl into a nearby incinerator. It was all that was left of Leia’s would-be lover.

She sat, distraught, both self-sufficient and deeply concerned that no one else would ever attempt to rescue her from her troubled existence. She was internally tortured. And she had never felt so… alone.

“Oh well,” she conceded, pushing herself upright and covertly wiping away a stream of tears. “I’m furtunate to at least have my boyfriend Bruce. He’s equally ameowzing!”

Holy rude awakening, Batman!